The illusion in the business world that work magically gets done through organizational charts, team rosters, deliverables, and deadlines is far from reality. The truth is, organizations and teams are run by people, and people are driven by emotions. The notion that emotions have no place in the workplace is false. Achieving significant business outcomes is not a purely rational exercise. It requires a professional approach to connect with the people you're depending on to get the right things done. In essence, emotions matter. The strategy is to connect first, and influence later. By acknowledging your human contributors and connecting with them, you increase your chances of influencing them. Connecting with people at an emotional level is not complex, it simply requires adherence to seven basic imperatives. However, it's shocking how often we forget that our colleagues are people just like us. Misunderstandings and misinterpretations can lead to complications, costs, and chaos when egos are bruised. Small slights can escalate into career-derailing moments, top performers may quit, and even business owners may want to leave the companies they built. We often have blinders on when it comes to our own behavior, and a magnifying glass when assessing offenses we have endured. But it doesn't have to be this way. Simple strategies can help us be better humans at work. Most of the suggestions in Connect First cost nothing and don't take more than five minutes to implement.
Building strong interpersonal relationships at work is crucial, and while grand gestures have their place, it's the consistent small acts of kindness, respect, and appreciation that truly forge connections. A simple yet effective way to connect is by smiling more. Smiles are contagious and can make you appear more likable, courteous, and competent. Make smiling a habit, especially when greeting coworkers, as it sets a positive tone. Politeness is also key, so say "please" often. It conveys respect and acknowledges the other person's ability to choose. Even when compliance is expected, saying please can lead to better service and performance. For added impact, make eye contact and smile when you say it. Learning and using "please" in your coworkers' native languages can also show respect and effort. Don't forget to express gratitude with "thank you." There's a strong link between appreciation and productivity, with many employees feeling better and working harder when thanked more often. Even Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg recognized the power of gratitude, challenging himself to write a thank you note every day. The more you demand at work, the more crucial it is to express thanks. Addressing people by name is another powerful tool. It activates neural connections in their brain and shows that you see them as individuals. Take the time to learn and remember names, writing them down if necessary, and don't overlook anyone in the workplace, including support staff like parking attendants and janitors. Providing sincere praise is also important. Recognizing someone's achievements can establish positive connections and enhance relationships. Many bosses think they give enough praise, but often that's not the case. When you do offer criticism, try to sandwich it between compliments and focus on future improvements rather than past mistakes. Open communication is essential. Send quick acknowledgments to confirm receipt of messages and avoid bottlenecks. If you need more time to respond, let the sender know when they can expect a follow-up. This keeps projects moving and shows you're engaged. Regular feedback is beneficial for everyone. Let people know when they've done great work and seek feedback for yourself as well. This not only helps with improvement but also strengthens relationships. Remember Mark Twain's words about living on a good compliment for two months. Positive interactions are indeed powerful motivators, and research indicates that the best predictor of happiness is strong relationships with family, friends, and coworkers. Small gestures, whether a smile or a word of thanks, can significantly impact someone's day and bring meaning to work. By making an effort to connect with courtesy, praise, and gratitude, you'll see improved productivity, collaboration, and satisfaction.
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