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Cover of 'Connect first'

Connect first

Melanie Katzman

52 strategies for workplace fulfillment and success

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Description

The illusion in the business world that work magically gets done through organizational charts, team rosters, deliverables, and deadlines is far from reality. The truth is, organizations and teams are run by people, and people are driven by emotions. The notion that emotions have no place in the workplace is false. Achieving significant business outcomes is not a purely rational exercise. It requires a professional approach to connect with the people you're depending on to get the right things done. In essence, emotions matter. The strategy is to connect first, and influence later. By acknowledging your human contributors and connecting with them, you increase your chances of influencing them. Connecting with people at an emotional level is not complex, it simply requires adherence to seven basic imperatives.

However, it's shocking how often we forget that our colleagues are people just like us. Misunderstandings and misinterpretations can lead to complications, costs, and chaos when egos are bruised. Small slights can escalate into career-derailing moments, top performers may quit, and even business owners may want to leave the companies they built. We often have blinders on when it comes to our own behavior, and a magnifying glass when assessing offenses we have endured. But it doesn't have to be this way. Simple strategies can help us be better humans at work. Most of the suggestions in Connect First cost nothing and don't take more than five minutes to implement.

Table of contents

01

Es­tab­lish­ing respect

Building strong interpersonal relationships at work is crucial, and while grand gestures have their place, it's the consistent small acts of kindness, respect, and appreciation that truly forge connections. A simple yet effective way to connect is by smiling more. Smiles are contagious and can make you appear more likable, courteous, and competent.

Make smiling a habit, especially when greeting coworkers, as it sets a positive tone. Politeness is also key, so say "please" often. It conveys respect and acknowledges the other person's ability to choose.

Even when compliance is expected, saying please can lead to better service and performance. For added impact, make eye contact and smile when you say it. Learning and using "please" in your coworkers' native languages can also show respect and effort.

Don't forget to express gratitude with "thank you." There's a strong link between appreciation and productivity, with many employees feeling better and working harder when thanked more often. Even Facebook's Mark Zuckerberg recognized the power of gratitude, challenging himself to write a thank you note every day.

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02

Engage all your senses

Building strong relationships with coworkers requires more than just verbal communication. It's about shared experiences and picking up on subtle cues that enrich relationships. In any organization, knowledge comes from engaging all your senses, not just hiding behind roles.

Firstly, it's important to acknowledge everyone, especially those who are often overlooked. These individuals often have unique perspectives, so it's crucial to practice openness and inclusion. Recognize the support staff that keep operations running smoothly and express your gratitude frequently.

Each person plays a vital role, so show you care at every opportunity. Rather than just being physically present, strive to truly see your colleagues as individuals. Make an effort to genuinely interact, and you'll be surprised at what you notice that you'd never considered before.

Secondly, improve your listening skills to inspire deeper conversations. Skilled listeners engage their hearts and senses, so try to do the same. Focus fully on what others are saying instead of just planning your response.

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03

Take charge and become likable

In today's interconnected world, the lines between personal and professional personas are increasingly blurred, making reputation management essential. To make a positive impact, it's important to be your best self consistently. Self-awareness is the cornerstone of this process.

Work environments now value transparency, and your personality is essentially a brand that reflects your values. To effectively manage your reputation, it's important to be fully present. Engage actively by making eye contact, listening intently, and being attuned to nonverbal cues.

Being approachable and sharing information promotes inclusivity and understanding, which in turn boosts morale. Starting the day with a brief team check-in can foster a sense of community and keep everyone informed. To become a valued team member, cultivate a level of proficiency that makes others seek your involvement.

By offering support, you help create a secure atmosphere for your colleagues. When entering a room, make a strong first impression with positive body language, such as smiling and offering handshakes, as initial judgments are formed quickly. Sharing stories can be a powerful tool for fostering cooperation, as they release oxytocin, a neurochemical that promotes bonding.

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04

Develop loyalty the cement that binds

Achieving your dreams is not a solitary endeavor. It requires understanding and harnessing the potential of those you work with, tapping into their motivations and aspirations. This understanding is the adhesive that binds successful teams and enables individuals to excel.

It's not merely about financial compensation, but about understanding what drives your colleagues. To foster loyalty, clarity in roles is paramount. Provide context and allow individuals to excel in their roles.

An organizational chart is a useful tool, but remember that these roles are filled by individuals with unique personalities who wish to leave their personal imprint on their work. Regularly clarify roles, reporting lines, and expectations. As roles evolve, maintain clarity.

Utilize tools like RESPONSABLE ACCOUNTABLE CONSULTED INFORMED charts to ensure role clarity during new projects or reviews of ongoing work. Connecting individual roles to the larger organizational mission gives people a sense of belonging. Highlight the impact of their work on real-world customers through stories shared in meetings.

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05

Resolve conflicts and engage

Conflict and adversity are often seen as negative experiences, but they can also be opportunities for profound connection and growth. It's in the heat of battle that the most meaningful relationships are often formed. This is because navigating through differences and learning to collaborate with a diverse range of individuals is a skill that can be honed over time.

When emotions run high and situations become complex, it's important to remember that the strongest bonds are formed amidst conflict, not during periods of smooth sailing. To leverage conflict to your advantage, there are several strategies to consider. The first is empathy.

The ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes can help solve their problems. If possible, immerse yourself in the other person's environment. Acknowledging their challenges can often aid in conflict resolution.

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06

Fight fear by being a trailblazer

Overcoming fear and uncertainty in a professional setting often necessitates stepping out of your comfort zone and taking the initiative. This proactive approach can help forge connections and establish common ground. The instinctive reaction of most people to fear or uncertainty is to retreat, defend the status quo, and maintain a low profile.

However, this behavior presents an opportunity for you to stand out. If you're feeling apprehensive at work, it's likely others are too. Here are some strategies to connect with others in similar situations.

Embrace discomfort as it can be a catalyst for achieving goals you never thought possible. Regularly challenge yourself both professionally and personally. Initiate interactions by creating forums for experts to discuss current issues, inviting competitors to explore potential collaborations, and ensuring everyone who can contribute energy and insight has a seat at the table.

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07

Increase your impact by giving meaning

Establishing connections is just the beginning; leveraging your platform effectively is where true impact is made. Regardless of your role, opportunities to create meaning and make a positive impact abound. Approach these opportunities with boldness and enthusiasm, as substantial impact is the most effective way to create meaning.

To deepen your understanding of success and leave a lasting impression, consider several strategies. First, embrace the unknown with open arms. Be receptive to new ideas and find joy in the learning process.

Let the future excite and challenge you. Maintain a curious mindset, question everything, and push yourself towards embracing what's to come. Encourage the flow of new insights and avoid dismissing ideas simply because they haven't been proven yet.

Second, honor your history and use it as a foundation for future endeavors. The formative stories that have shaped your journey can inspire courage and innovation. Learn from your past, take pride in your origins, and be transparent about past mistakes and their resolutions.

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