In business and life, success often comes from focusing on helping others achieve their goals. By aiding others, they'll likely reciprocate, aiding your own success. People skills are crucial; they help you build networks that support mutual success without direct requests for help. The most successful individuals are not the loudest but those with the best people skills. Happiness and success depend on the relationships you cultivate. In our hyper-connected world, where personal referrals are gold, being liked, respected, and trusted is the key to influence and achieving your desires.
Understanding oneself is the first step towards influencing others effectively. Organizations have traditionally used Myers-Briggs assessments to identify personality types, but the Enneagram test offers a more nuanced understanding of communication preferences and how to interact with others based on their Enneagram scores. Dave Kerpen emphasizes the importance of self-awareness in understanding unconscious motivations and interaction styles to better influence and understand others. To connect with someone on a personal level, engaging in a genuine conversation over coffee, asking about their professional and personal life, dreams, aspirations, and influences can reveal their worldview more effectively than superficial topics. This approach of being genuinely interested and actively listening without an ulterior motive fosters deeper connections. Dave Kerpen, Dale Carnegie, Bernard Baruch, and Peter Drucker all highlight the power of listening in building relationships, understanding unspoken communication, and ultimately, influencing others more effectively. The practice of listening more than speaking in meetings can lead to greater learning and make coworkers feel valued and understood. Authentic connection and understanding, rather than manipulation, are key to influencing others positively.
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